Newlywed Advice: Choosing Where to Go for the Holidays

The holidays are stressful for most everyone, but they can be even more so for newlyweds who now have to decide where and which side of the family to visit and create the standard for future holidays. This issue should be resolved with the three C's: compassion, communication and compromise. Here are some solutions to common situations:

If you live a long distance from both sides of the family. You both may have family all over and find yourselves at a total loss during the holidays. You want to visit everyone, but it may be too expensive to travel; and depending on the distance, it might even be physically impossible to get from one place to another. In this situation, many couples switch up where they go every year. So, for instance, this year, you could visit your family in California for Christmas and your spouse's family in New York next year. Or, if you enjoy having guests from out of town, you can invite both sets of parents and siblings to come to you for the holidays.

One other option: You can choose to have a romantic holiday at home with just you two. This can be a great idea if there's tension between your spouse and the in-laws or if you're saving up for the future.

If you reside in the same city or town as one side of the family, but the other is far away. This could be a situation where one side of the family controls the couple's life. If this is the case, the spouse whose family is always around should do his or her best to accommodate the other spouse's desires during the holidays. So, if your parents are at your house a lot, you should visit your in-laws to celebrate Christmas-- it's only fair.

Another option: Ask family who live far away to stay at your home as guests. And if everyone gets along, have the "in-city family" join you for dinner, and you can celebrate the holidays together.

You live close to both sides of the family. When everyone lives close to each other, deciding where to visit can be very hard. Family on both sides likely feel you should choose their side because it's convenient. If both sides are amicable, having a joint get-together is a good idea. If not, one idea is to spend Christmas morning with one side and Christmas night with the other.

Another option: If you're expecting or have a newborn, think about establishing your own traditions. For example, invite all the grandparents to come over on Christmas morning to see the baby receive his/her gifts.

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Beat the Post Wedding Blues

Many couples spend at least a year in the spotlight as an engaged couple. For some people, it can be tough to go from planning a wedding and having all eyes on you to the married life. If you're experiencing post-wedding blues, here are five ways to get out of your funk:

1. Gain perspective. Yes, your wedding was fun, but it was just one day; your marriage should last a lifetime. Truthfully, the day after your wedding is the really exciting day-- it's the start of your life together. You now have the opportunity to show your commitment and love to each other daily, create a family and home and dream big. Begin by talking about your next big goal; it could be putting away for a romantic weekend getaway or buying your first home. This will give you something else to focus on.
2. Get cozy. You've probably done nothing but think about and plan a wedding for the last few months. And while it might have been, it was still work; planning a wedding can drain your energy and increase stress. Now that it's over, you probably have recaptured some precious time. With that said, it's okay to take a rest and do nothing for awhile--savor your newfound laziness.
3. Go out. Sometimes, engaged couples tend to desert their friends and family leading up to the wedding because they're swamped with things to do. Make it up to them by having dinner, seeing a movie, going for a hike or taking a trip to the beach. Do something you enjoy and haven't had time to do in a while. Your friends and family will appreciate your company and boost your spirits.
4. Have a party. If you really crave another celebration, set a date for a get together at your place. Sure, it'll be smaller than a wedding, but you can still make invitations, centerpieces, place settings and a menu. You can show off all the fabulous gifts you received and put them to good use. Invite those you wish you could have spent more one-on-one time with at the wedding. And be sure to have loads of fun!
5. Take on a project. Many newlyweds feel nostalgic after their weddings, and that's okay. Feel free to embrace it by talking about your wedding, looking at the photos and watching the video. You could also tackle on a project that would honor your wedding in some way. For example, you can create a collage of your wedding photos or create a scrapbook. These activities will help keep your mind busy, give you the opportunity to think about the happy memories and leave you with a momento you can use whenever you want to put a smile on your face.
   
   
   
   

Source; Photo Credit: weddingbells.ca