12 Wedding Tips with no Regrets

By Julie Ndagire

Like most women. Glenda has been dreaming of her wedding since she was a little girl. But now that it’s around the corner, she is weighed down by all the things she needs to to to make her wedding the fairtale that she has always wanted. She never thought that planning a wedding a wedding could be such a headache. From the day her fiancé popped the question, the great elation she felt has since dwindled to near distate for the big day.

Nobody said that planning a wedding would be easy but many brides and their grooms don’t expect it to be so overwhelming. Once you zero in into the details, there is a lot to plan for. Apart from the real work, there is the money aspect of it.

Weddings are getting more and more expensive and the bigger your dreams is, the bigger the budget. Many a couple find themselves weighed down by planning and the stress actually impacts other aspects of their lives especially the relationships itself; with brides turning into ‘bridezilla’ if they are not getting their way.

It is possible to have a wedding and still keep your keep your head about you? Can you plan your wedding without alienating your family, friends and most importantly your fiancé? Yes you can. Here are tips to help you plan.

Do not procrastinate
From the moment you know that you are getting marries, start planning, Rogers Kisitu of forever events says that you need about a year to plan your wedding. “These days, you need about a year to book your church venue and even people getting married. You might get the church booked but find that the venue of your desire is unavailable on that day. That is why I would advise couple to start a whole year in advance so that they avaoid any disappointments or be forced to have their wedding during the week,” he says.
Spreading out on your planning overtime will also ease the burden of it so get on it as soon as possible.

Ask for help
Tell your friends what you envision your wedding to be like and ask them to help you come up with themes, colour schemes and other ideas. You will get more wonderful ideas with a little help.

Social media
Utilise social media to plan with your committee. You can have an e-mail group or facebook page where you can keep your friends updated with your planning and also get ideas from people without having to meet in person. This gives people time to contribute to your day in their free time without hassle.

Plan & Budget
Once you have set the date for the wedding , draw up a plan , a kind of timeline to guide you on planning for the big day. Once you have listed all the things you will need to do, put them down on the timeline so you have a spefic time allotted to a specific item.

Also, make a budget and stick to it. Pelga Origasha of Dashing Tale Events acknowledges that weddings are getting bigger each year, with couples breaking the bank to fund weddings they can’t really afford.’
“Stick with what you can afford so that you can avoid unnecessary stress, “ she says. “I would advise brides to do research beforehand and put a price on all the things they want like the gown, hair, nails, makeup etc. So you have a distinction on what you can afford and what needs to be out on the wedding budget for the meetings.”

Limit service providers
The less people you have to coordinate, the better. Kisitu of Forever Events say if you can get several services from one provider, utilize that opportunity. For example, get a venue that can a venue that can also provide the tables, chairs, linen, lighting, music and PA systems and even food plus drinks. This way, you will get a discount easily and also minimize the number of contacts.

Get a wedding planner
If you should shoulder the expenses, hire someone to shoulder the burden for you. Good wedding planners are available these days to help plan your wedding. Don’t feel like you are abdicating your role to someone, you can still make all the big decisions but she/he will work out the details. Pelga says that they are especially important in identifying the best service providers and can even get you good deals.

Me time
When you feel you are getting stressed out, take off time to exercise either by running, walking or going to the gym. Pelga advises brides to also use this time to have a facial and nails done months before the big day. A massage with your bridal entourage could also help release some stress. Also, by keeping fit and maintaining a healthy diet, you will have more energy to expand towards your wedding preparations while you are also keeping in shape for the big day.

Be flexible
Sometimes you might not be able to afford your dream wedding but it is not the end of the world. You should b willing to work within your budget. If you can’t have lilies, settle for roses. If you can’t afford expensive band, get a cheaper option. Remember that the wedding is only the beginning of the rest of your life.

Be realistic
Sarah Akwi says she had six months to plan her wedding but all pleasure she felt came from herself or fiancé.
“A wedding is special but it is about two people who are in love and have decided to make a commitment to each other and that is what matters most. We have such unrealistic expectations of the wedding day that we make it bigger than it really is. Think of it as a beautiful, important but fun day”, she says.
Once people look at a wedding more objectively, they will be less stressed.

Delegate
Managing wedding stress is all about understanding just how much you’re capable of handling and in turn, recognizing when you’re way in over your head. “Think critically about all the tasks you have on your plate relating to the wedding, everything from meeting with the decorator to compiling the guest list. While some things will obviously have to be handled solely by you, determine what task can be delegated and enlist close family members, friends and your bridesmaids to help execute all those finicky details,” says Pelga.

As the wedding draws closer, your committee should take over all responsibility and liaise with the service providers. You don’t need people to be calling you on your wedding day.

Time for Each Other
The stress of planning and money worries can put a strain on the relationship, or limit your time spent with your together. Purpose to spend time together not talking about the wedding – not easy but achievable. Always remember that the end goal is the marriage not the wedding day only.

Benjamin says the last month to his wedding was nightmare that had him and his fiancé fighting to no end. Two weeks to the  to the wedding, he called up his fiancée and drove them to Entebbe to spend the day at the beach. They laughed off the stress and came back determined to enjoy the rest of the  their time.

You can’t please at all
“It is your wedding. Friends and family members especially parents often want to have a say in your specially day. Try to remind them that you and your partner are the ones getting married and be firm with this,” says Pelga. You cant please your old school parents who want traditional dancers and also your friends who want traditional dancers and also your friends who want guest artistes at the wedding without breaking the bank. This might mean putting your foot down.

As you plan for your wedding, there will be some stress but you can decide how much it affects you. There is nothing like the perfect wedding; so don’t kill yourself trying to be perfect with every details. So exercise, rest, play and enjoy the planning. You are the star of your wedding so don’t let the stress dull your shine on the big day

Procedure for Church weddings

You have one opportunity to take your vows in an unforgettable ceremony, surrounded by your loving family and friends. Getting married will change your lives dramatically.
Change can be a good thing, but amidst all the excitement, you will need to feel emotionally calm and safe to be good to one another and to continue to love one another. Be one another’s soft place to fall, protect, encourage and look after one another.

A church is the ideal place to get married: there is a solemn atmosphere; it creates a dignified backdrop with heavenly organ music. You dedicate your lives to one another and to God, the strongest ally in all the world.
This is different from a birthday party or a reunion or an office party. This is the real thing! The contrast between the solemnity of a church ceremony and the jollity of the reception will add a special sparkle to the event.
The minister
Ask the minister to discuss the exact order of events during the ceremony with you. Remember to pay him and to invite him and his wife to the reception.
The minister will probably advise you to attend a premarital adjustment course. Invest in such a course it really is worth the effort!
Inform the minister in writing about who will provide any musical items, as well as the name of the composition and the composer.
The verger (a church official who acts as a caretaker and attendant and looks after the inside of a church, usually including the furnishings and the vestments) Book and discuss the day, date and time of your wedding with the verger well ahead of time. Ask him for information about all fees that have to be paid (the verger, organist, minister, etc.). Arrange a time for the rehearsal.
Rehearsal
Arrange a day before the wedding when the bridal group, verger, minister and, if possible, the choir can rehearse at the church. Make sure that everyone concerned knows exactly what will happen when.
Order of service
Include the names of the minister/officiant /priest, organist, choir, other soloists, composers and even the bridal retinue (if there is room) on the printed order of service. References to the readings, music and the words of the hymns that are to be sung should also be inserted.

Who sits where?
The bride’s family and friends sit on the left in the front of the church, the groom’s family and friends sit to the right.
When everyone has taken his/her place about five minutes or so before
the bride enters the bride’s mother enters and sits down in the first or second pew from the front. She keeps a place open next to her for the bride’s father along the aisle.

The order of events
The bride and her father drive to the church together she sits in the back of the car at the right, with her father to her left. He brings her into the church walking to his right: this is the place of honour. Her left hand rests on his right forearm, but she can tuck her hand into his arm if she needs a little more support.

The bride’s entrance is a dramatic moment: the guests rise, the organ music rings out joyously in a wedding march or another classical piece.

The groom and the best man wait in the front of the church. The bride’s father gives her to the groom at the end of the aisle. The bride stands in the centre, her father kisses her on her forehead or cheek, he and the groom shake hands (he tells the groom to treat his new wife well) and the bridal couple walk forward to the centre, right in front of the marriage officer.


The bride and groom do not touch. Once the minister (who must be a licensed marriage officer) has said ‘Take each other’s right hand’, they exchange rings and hold each other’s right hands. Only then should she take his arm (unless either of them needs more support before that moment!). After the blessing, the bridal couple, the minister and the witnesses sign the register. Then the bridal group leaves the church.

The bridal group leaves the church in the following order:
The bridal couple in front, followed by the bride’s mother walking out with the groom’s father to her right, then the groom’s mother with the bride’s father to her right, then the retinue.

The flower girls leave the church before the guests do so that they can be ready to distribute the confetti at the doors.

The photographer and videographer
A video and wedding photographs of the ceremony are precious mementoes. However, you need to agree with the minister and photographers about when the pictures are to be taken and how many will be taken.

Arrange a meeting between the videographer and the photographer sometimes they can get in each other’s way unless they have made some
prior arrangements. So, for example, the one can take the lead once, then the other

Tips on How to Avoid Children Ruining The Occasion

Many couples have relatives and friends with children who are cute as a button, or maybe even children of their own. Typically these children become flower girls and ring bearers which make a charming addition to any wedding party. However, their adorable ways can turn into antics fast without proper planning. If you are planning on having children in your bridal party, the following are a few tips to make sure that your pint-size guests meet your expectations.

A child loves to be the center of attention but today is not the day. In order to make them feel special take a few moments to show your appreciation. Before the ceremony, take a few pictures with them, tell them how cute they look, and give them a special gift just as you would the rest of your wedding party.

For those ceremonies not taking place in the morning, make sure your flower girl and ring bearer take a nap. No one wants a cranky child. Other pre-ceremony musts are using the restroom have to go light snack to avoid hunger, a double check of clothing for stains, go over directions, and give praise. Give them confidence and reinsurance so they do not freeze when all eyes are looking at them walking down the aisle.

Prevent children from being uncomfortable by providing a snack before and after the wedding ceremony. Choose snacks that will not make a mess nor stain clothing; crackers, string-cheese, and sugar cookies, and small bottles of water, are a good choice. Package treats in coordinating bags, embellished with ribbons and personalized name tags. Prepare treats for more than just your flower girl and ring bearer; other young children (if invited) will also become antsy sitting through the ceremony. Designate a parent or older child to pass out the treat bags.

Even though the flower girl and ring bearer are part of the bridal party, they may not be the most patient when standing during the vow exchange. Let them sit in the front row during the ceremony. Make sure that their parent or grandparent can motion them to take a seat beside them. Then let them rejoin the party during the processional. Also make sure that the child’s parent or another family member is prepared to scoop up the child if a tantrum breaks out. It is not the most ideal situation but knowing that someone is prepared well give you peace of mind.

Another widely accepted tip is to have fake rings attached to the pillow for the ring bearer to carry. Depending on the age of the child, younger children have a tendency to drop and loose things. Give the real rings to the best man and maid of honor.

After the ceremony can be the most important time to give the children notice. This is a time of celebration when all the attention turns to the bride and groom. Children can sometimes become confused on what to do next. Give them a hug, thank them, and let them know that you will see them later if you have decided that children will be allowed at your reception. If so, save them a dance!

Hopefully these tips help you start brainstorming on what to expect and how to be prepared for your younger wedding party guests. It may seem like a lot of work but it will save you a lot. You will t hank me when the wedding is done and it is a success